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Send JOIN SHAKTIMAAN to 0987O8O7O7O for Receive daily new Sexy Jokes (its FREE)

Raat k andhere me santa:uff ye condom itna tight aur itna chota Q hai? Wife:aye bina dimag k janwar ye cndm nai bachche k dudh ki nipple hai.. saas-aane de bete ko aaj baith k bataungi teri kartut, Bahu-koi fayda nahi, saas-kyu? Bahu-kyu ki aap baith k samjhaogi aur mai let k Sardar 2 shopkeeper: "mere size ka condom milega?" Shopkeeper: "tum itne bare condom ka kya karoge?" Sardar: fancy dress show me lu#d ban k jaunga

yaad kar woh bachapan ke hasin din
jab hum-tum garden me khela karte the!
tum lollypop ke liye roya karte the aur,
hum apni pant ki zip khol ke tumhe manaya karte the !!

sardar interview Q:ur name plz..? A:baldev singh Q:sex..? A:3 times a week Q:no,i mean, male or female? A:it doesnt matter jo mil jaye what is recycling? a marwadi giving used condom to his son to use as a BALLOON & after Bursting giving to his daughter to use as a hair band. bachcha-papa is baar mummy ka sardar hoga santa-o tuje kaise pata chala? Kal jab mummy naha rhi thi to dadi bahar latki hui thi.from

mulla ji bra lene shop par gaye
mulla ji: ek bra de do
shopkeepar: kis size ki du?
mulla ji: size to pata nahi par biwi ki purani bra me se meri do topi ban gayi hai.

Perfume wala : "sahab perfume lelo perfume"
1 man "25 paise wala dikhao.."
perfume wala " ga#d me ungli dal ke sungh le .
18 sal ki Ladki K 18 vachan..
1.Mera peecha mat karo
2.Mai sharif ladki hu
3.Bus ek bar bolugi I L U 4.Sirf ek bar milugi
5.Kuch karna nahi
6.Koi dekh lega
7.Bus upar se kar lo
8.Panty mat utaro
9.Bas ek bar hi karwaungi
10.Sharm aa rahi hai,Muh se nikalo
11.Bahut lamba hai
12.itna mota nahi jayega
13.Jor se mat dalna
14.Bahut dard ho raha hai
15.Chuchi ko chuso
16.Kamar ko pakd kar dalo
17.Aur Jor se dhakka maro
18.Bahar mat nikalo..........
Raat ki tanhai me haath under wear ki gehrai me kuch mehsus sa hota hai mat sataao usko saalo kyunki........pappu bhi sota hai........

Jinke paas hai...
woh haath me leke hilate hai,

jinke paas nahi hai...
woh ungli dalke kam chalate hai

BOLO KYA?

Dirty Mind …… It is ….. TOOTH BRUSH

Sardar ki biwi mar gai, dost ne pucha kaise mar gai.
Sardar: yar muh me muh tha, ch~t me l~nd tha,
ga#d me ungali thi aatma pata nahi kaha se gai.

BLOOD TEST k liye sui chubhane k bad NURSE ne marij ki ungli muh me le li.NURSE-Aap itna muskura kyo rahe ho. MARIJ-kal URINE TEST hai. LADY-Saree me agar ek bhi ched dikha to saree waapas kar dungi.DUKANDAAR- Madam ji, aap "Ched" dikhao to shi, saree aapko free me de dunga a Sardar to call girl: "whar's ur rate"?
girl: 100 on bad, 50 on sofa, 10 on floor.
Sardar gives 100 Rs.
girl: ohh on bad !
Sardar: no 10 time on floor.
blood test k baad nurse ne sardar ki ungli chusi, sardar ji muskuraye,nurse ne pucha kya hua? sardar "iske baad urin test hai" Sardar Train me susu karne gaya
wife:Apka pajama gila kaise hua?
Sardar:vaha likha tha
sharir ka koi ang bahar na nikale
College girls: Jab hum apas me gandi-gandi bate karte hai to ladko k kaan khade ho jate hai na!
Boys: achha tum log usko kaan kehte ho?
Gareebi kya hai?
...??
...??
jab koi Ladki 2 Rs. me sx karwane k liye taiyar ho...
...??
...??
...??
aur tumhare pass sirf 1 Rs. ho.
Santa to Dr.- "Ga#d me dard hai"
Dr.- "mai hath ghusata hu batana dard kaha hai"
Santa- "andar aur andar aur andar aur haan yahi hai"
Dr.- "Bhosdi k gale me TONSIL hai"
Public bus me sardarni ne sardar se kaha: Sunoji ye aadmi mere blouse me hath daal raha hai,
Sardar: Koi baat nai dalne do, tumhara purse mere paas hai.
a sardar entered into ladies toilet, a lady said "ye mahilaon ke liye hai" sardar open his zip and said "ye bhi mahilaon ke liye hi hai.." snta-"yar teri bhabhi nhi hai warna tuje chay jarur pilata" bnta-"are yar kabhi to dudh market se liya kar".
Pregnant Lady chhat pe tange khol k leti hui thi..,
Santa: Ye kya ho raha hai?
Lady: Dr. ne kaha hai k tazi hawa bachche k sehat k liye achchi hai.
aisi kaun si jagah hai?
Jaha admi or aurat dono k baal ghungrale hote hai??
?
Dirty Mind?
?
Kitna Ganda sochte ho?
wo jagah hai
WEST INDIES
Badi murgi: Dekh Mere ande kitne bade Hai Rs. 2.25 Me bikte Hai Tere To Sirf 2/-Me jate Hai,
Choti Murgi:Rahne Do Chawanni k Liye koun ga#d fadega..
wife- aaj jab mai  apni bra utar rahi thi tab ek ladka mujhe dekh raha tha,
husband- phir tumne kya kiya?
wife- maine bra se apne muh chupa liya.
Ek Ladki Khadi Ho Kar Josh Me Boli- aaj Ki Nari Kya Nahi Kar Sakti?
Santa Bola "DEEWAR Pe PESHAAB"
Miss:Machar se Aids pehlta hai ya nahi?
Student: Nahi!
Miss:Explain karo?
Student:Madam jee, Machar dunk marta hai,GA#D nahi
Santa gusse se se: "Mera dil chahta hai ki tera khoon p jao"
wife: "Pehle batana tha ab to PERIODS khatam ho gaye hai"
Teacher-"wats ur name"
Santa-"HOLA"
Teacher-"ye kya naam hua"
Santa-"mai HOLI k din paida hua tha"
Teacher-"thank god tum LOHDI k din paida nhi hue"
1 sardar ne AAG Bujhane k liye phuk mari
to uske piche se Poo nikal gai, Phir phuk mari
Fir se Poo nikal gai
Sardar GUSSE me GA#D Ghumakar bola le tu hi bujha..
Dr. tumhari biwi ko gas problem hai
wo pregnant nahi hai
Sardar: o uparwale tune mujhe Lu#d diya hai ya
Hawa bharne ka Pump
.
Santa & Banta k bich fight ho rahi thi,
Santa: mai tare kapade phad k tujko nanga kar dunga.
Banta: serious ladai me Romantic baat mat kar
a sardar breaks an egg to make an omellette, he notices that the egg is empty,
sardar says "be#ch#d ab murge bhi condom use karne lag gaye"
Teacher- jab mai padhati hu to tum sir me tel kyu laga lete ho?
Santa- kal rat mummy papa se keh rahi thi agar andar nhi jaraha hoto tel laga lo.
Son- dad Maine Khawab Dekha K Mera 1 Pao Zamin Par aur Dusra asman me Hai.
Sardar- Is Tarah K Khawab Na Dekha Karo Warna Ga#d Fatt jayegi.

2 rand khadi thi
1boli-lagta he grahak a raha hai,
dusri-tuje kaise pata?
pehli-mujhe lu#d ki sugandh aa rahi hai,
dusri-are pagli wo to maine dakaar mari thi.

2 Girls were masturbating with carrots.
Banta says: What r u doing?
Gals: U naughty guy, will u join us?
Banta: Wait, I'll get a carrot.
Santa-Yaar maine naye detergent se apni chaddhi
dhoyi aur wo chhoti ho gayi.Ab kya karu?
Banta- Usi detergent se apni GA#D bhi dho le.
Sardar sees front side of a girls T-Shirt that reads: HANDLE WITH CARE
Next day sardar wears jeans &
writes: CANDLE WITH HAIR
Sx is good and sx is funny, many people f~ck for money, but if you think sx is funny, so f~ck your self and save your money. Ganjo k pant ki jebo me chhed kyu hone chahiye ?
?
?
?
Taaki wo log bhi baalo me ungliya phirane ka armaan pura kar sake.
Everything on a girls upper body start with "B"
Blouse, Bra, Bikini, B00bs & lower with
"P"
Panty, Petticoat, P~ssy
Now u know y Man have "BP" problms!
Ladka- hum ladkiyo se jyada educated hai! Ladki- kAbhi nAhi! Hum kuch bhi kar sakte hai!
Ladka- thik hai phir, susu se "abcd" likh kar dikhao!
What is the pure sanskrit mame of pen!s?
'mutra nishkasak shishu utpadak anand dayak nalika'
Kuch sikho salo 'La~da La~da' chillate rehte ho.
7 year old kid: papa, ye sx kya hota hai?
Papa explains everything to him about sx
Kid: but how should I write all that in this small box of school exam form.
Gaon- tatti
Shaher- latrine
Hindu- sandas
Muslim- pakhana
Angrez- shit
Naam alag par maal sbka ek
Rup rang anek khusbu ek
Anekta me ekta, TATTI ki vishesta.
Turr
Furr purr
Murrr..
Gurrrr.
Churrrr
Hans mat
Bete ye Lu#d gayab karne ka mantra hai dekh tera gayab to nahi hua.
Most interesting lines on
T- shirt of a college girl..
*
*
"excuse me!
My face is
Above"
Banta: dunia gol hai.
Santa: aap bolte ho to maan leta hoon,
baapu to kahte hain ki dunia madarch#d hai.
Log apne kapdo k style pe na jane kitne paise barbaad kar dete he. Par shayad wo bhul jate he ki jindgi k sab se hasin pal bina kapdo k guzaare jate hai.

Sachin ke sar pe sawar tha 200 run ka bhoot,
South Africa ne diya pant me moot,
Ab sab milke ZOR SE BOLO...
SAEED ANWAR ki M## KI CH##T.!

Zindgi me humesha 1 baat yaad rakho...
Kabi kisi k Dil se mat khelo,
kyu ki DiL 1 hi hota hai
agar khelna hai, to b00bs se khelo, ye 2 hoti hai.
Sexy names of
actresses:
1- urmila maacho%kar
2- mamta kukarmi
3- padmini kholapudi
4- mahima chodri
5- karina ka-boor
6- mallika chodavat
Kya tum chhote-bade ho sakte ho.?
Muh se paani aur malai nikal sakte ho.?
.
Nahi na

.

.

Dost, sirf shakal Lu#d jaisi hone se kuch nahi hota.
Ladki aur SMS me kya similarity hai?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Jab tak uper se niche tak pura dekh na lo chain hi nahi aata.
Tiger 1411 hain India me.
Lekin ladke aur ladki ka ratio..1000:824 hai

Plzzz save girls.

Tiger bacha k kya unki ga#d maroge..
Chu%ai ke 2 imp rules-

Pehli baar is tarah cho%o Jaise dusri baar kabhi milegi hi nahi

Dusri baar is tarah cho%o Jaise pehle kabhi cho%a hi nahi.
Jab koi wife pregnant ho to uski sari saheliya us k pet pe hath pher k kehti hai "congratulations", Par koi husband k popat pakad kar ye nahi kehti "welldone" Har aurat sx k time alag-alag baat karti hai,
Naokrani- jaldi karo malkin aa jayegi,
Padosan- dhire karo awaz bahar na jaye,
Prmika- thoda aur karom
BV- pankha kitna ganda ho gaya hai.
Zindgi ki race me 1st aane ke liye
Humesha ye soch ke bhago

Ki

Piche lu#d hai,
agar ruke to ga#d me ghus jayega..
Que:- what is confidence?
ans- once ten boys decide to purpose a girl, 9 boys came with rose and 1 with CONDOM..!
That's the confidence.

Yaar tu wo hi ladka hai na jisne matric k english k paper me question dekha..
“fill in the blanks" aur fir tu teen ghante apni hi ga#d me ungali daal kar baitha raha.

Late night SMS- "chutkule" na hote to baat baat me maza na aata..! Par main kehta hu ki "ch~t" aur "kule" na hote to raat raat bhar maza na aata..!!

Soni sex par dekhiye, 8 baje- maniben ka bhos%a,
8.30- tarak mehta ka ulta law%a,
9- sajan re ga#d mat maro,
9.30- jugani chali maa chu%ane, 10- la pata lu#d.

 

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